Like a baby’s butt

Maybe I am over-reacting, but I am a little peeved with the lack of observational skills my friends and co-workers have. I have been sporting a sweet beard for around 9 months, which I recently shaved off.
So far, my own parents didn’t notice, none of my co-workers mentioned it, and one friend actually said, “you had a beard?”
I am now pondering testing the limits of my co-workers/friends’ obliviousness by wearing a different fake mustache every day until someone notices. Alas, the choice of which to choose first: the magnum p.i., the earl, who knows…
If I was a woman, I would swear that they are all just looking at my chest.